The Recruiting Inferno

One year ago today – 1 PM EST – my beloved Mr. Stinky passed on to that great catnip meadow in heaven. Yes, I’m grieving today but it doesn’t prevent me from ratcheting up my recruiting efforts to help l me get through the day.

David Hosier ruminates about trivial matters here – I think his writings are pretty darn funny. One of his older posts is about lessons he learned from his cat Dilbert. Dave’s observations IMHO have direct correlations to recruiting success…

1. Show people that you’re happy to see them. It’s unfortunate that far too many in our profession view speaking with people as a chore. Whatupwitdat? Every person has the potential to feed you a treat or scratch you on the head.
2. Play wildly, and play often. I’ve wrote often through the years here at ERE that recruiting is one of the top three toughest and most important jobs in any company. Did I mention the very best think 24/7? Always try new things and don’t be afraid to make a fool of yourself – people truly appreciate transparency.
3. Be affectionate with people you like. Don’t be afraid to bring them a mouse tail or a bird’s head. Remember their birthdays and important facts about their lives. It’s all CRM, right ~jer?
4. Help people clean up their messes. Look, if someone royally screws up an interview, take the time to debrief and work with them to improve. Coach them, mentor them, whatever it takes to get them to the next level. You will be rewarded (of course you’ll still have a few more messes to clean up).
5. When someone does something that hurts you, violently kick and bite them. Maybe it’s just the New Yorker in me but never get mad, get even. If a “client” screws you out of revenue, well, you know what you have to do.
6. Say hi to people out your windows. Always observe, always say something. You never know where your next treat will come from.
7. Always look for new things to sniff. Stop thinking everything’s a damn nail just because you know how to use one hammer. Unsettle yourself by trying something new once each week.
8. Eat anything and everything you find on the floor. lol, everything’s a potential meal, whether it’s big or small. Small gets big, big gets bigger. What’s the worst you can do – yack it up somewhere?
9. Try to kill toy mice by drowning them in your water dish. Toy mice=recruiter wannabes.
10. Sit in the bathtub and watch drops of water roll towards the drain. Every great recruiter must spend time observing – success isn’t always about the pitch. Observation typically improves clarity and clarity is the gateway to new ideas.
11. Eat bugs. Even little bugs have protein value (at least Bear Gryllis says so)

David also offers lessons learned from one his other cats but I haven’t related them to recruiting…yet. Here they are:

1. Don’t talk to strangers: Sniff them first.
2. Know when it’s your time to get attention.
3. Don’t take someone else’s job: After you do your “business” in the litter box, leave it for Dilbert to clean up. He’s good at that.
4. Don’t give your caretaker more work to do when they come home.
5. Throw up in the middle of the night when they’re sleeping.
6. Let others know when you’re not happy with them: Hiss and growl.
7. Reach for the unattainable: Chase light and reflections from watches.
8. Remember your roots: Knead soft, fuzzy things.
9. Don’t be ashamed of your shortcomings: If you feel carsick, just lose control of all bodily functions. That’ll teach ’em.

So in honor of Mr. Stinky, how about acting like a feline today?