A current discussion – “Stop Feeling Sorry for American Veterans” – in the LinkedIn US Army group revolves around our reaction to those who served; the article that engendered the post is here and is an incredible read.
While it has become as common as a handshake upon meeting a veteran to add, “Thank you for your service”, I’ve wondered why this response has become de rigueur. I’ve concluded that it is a combination of guilt, sadness, uncertainty, pride, empathy, and compassion in proportions that change for every person. Yet I still don’t understand the “why?”; any thoughts?
My Dad is a WWII vet; saw his best bud hit with a mortar shell from about 10 yards away during the taking of a little hill in Italy. He was sent back from the line for about 3 days, given a few packs of cigarettes, and sent back up. Was begrudgingly diagnosed with PTSD decades later – if I recall, the “battle” took about two years and was obfuscated by the loss of veterans’ records courtesy of a little fire in St. Louis – and given extra vet benefits. After finally telling me about the events of that day on the hill, now I think I know why he “exploded” so often when I was young. He told me he was sorry; I told him I loved him even more than I already did.
I believe many who continue to say “Thank you for your service” don’t really understand what went on/goes on behind the scenes; perhaps for the long-term it might be better to simply ask if you can buy a vet a cup of coffee and spend the time getting to know what it was like for them. Listening is far better than a “Thank you for your service” followed by turning and walking away. It doesn’t make any sense to me to pay homage to a flag or watch veterans marching in a parade without getting to know the very same people who have served to ensure that you can do these.
As for me, I’ll continue to take my Dad to the Ft. Hamilton VA for is weekly Wednesday P/T and talk to any vet who cares to share their story. If you’re there, stop by in the canteen around 10 00 hours and say hi to a Dad and his son.
I’ll never ignore you.
[Next on the RecruitingInferno, my take on recruiting veterans]
The Recruiting Inferno 
We live in a different time. WWII veterans were welcomed home with a parade, benefits for education and housing, job opportunities and most importantly they were respected for their service. Vietnam Vets adopted a standard greeting to each other: “Welcome Home!” That was because when we got back there were no parades and no welcome. The decrescendo of activity after the World Wars continued to die out and is only a back-burner concern to most people today. The wars we fight today are remote and politically controversial, but military professionals continue to do the things necessary to protect freedom and are above politics. We need to make an effort to renew our interest in their welfare and to recognize their sacrifice. At a bare minimum we need to restore the respect for them that they deserve.
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Interesting post Steve. I have never been in the military, but my dad, former brother-in-law and two of my nephews have. Actually, one nephew is currently serving in the Middle East. I certainly won’t speak from a position of great knowledge on this topic, but I can tell you how I feel. I do say thank you to veterans and I tell them that I believe them to be a heroes. Frankly for one very good reason, because they are doing something I can’t imagine doing. How do we repay these individuals who put their lives on the line? Yes, we can offer them jobs and housing and education benefits. I’m not diminishing these things, but in reality, are they really the equivalent of a person’s life? No of course not. But when we can couple these things with sincere respect and gratitude, it does bring us to a place of showing appreciation.
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